Review: The DUFF (Designated Ugly Fat Friend) by Kody Keplinger

The DUFF (Designated Ugly Fat Friend)

Author: Kody Keplinger

Publisher: Little Brown

Series: N/A

Pages: 288

Genre: Contemporary

Release Date: September 7, 2010

How Received: Won 

Summary: Seventeen-year-old Bianca Piper is cynical and loyal, and she doesn’t think she’s the prettiest of her friends by a long shot. She’s also way too smart to fall for the charms of man-slut and slimy school hottie Wesley Rush. In fact, Bianca hates him. And when he nicknames her “the Duff,” she throws her Coke in his face.

But things aren’t so great at home right now, and Bianca is desperate for distraction. She ends up kissing Wesley. Worse, she likes it. Eager for escape, Bianca throws herself into a closeted enemies-with-benefits relationship with him.

Until it all goes horribly awry. It turns out Wesley isn’t such a bad listener, and his life is pretty screwed up, too. Suddenly Bianca realizes with absolute horror that she’s falling for the guy she thought she hated more than anyone.

My Thoughts:

I picked up The Duff because I wanted a light-hearted read, and someone had recommended it to me as such. It was definitely that, and more (the romance seriously made me giddy a couple of times there!). A word of forewarning for those of you who screen books: this book uses f-bombs and other vulgar words out there like they’re toilet paper.

Bianca was such a lovely character to read. Not because I love cynical girls, but because she wasn’t your typical Mary-sue goody-two-shoes. I enjoyed reading her narrative because it was so far, yet so close, to how I would react or how I’d think in certain situations. She’s level-headed and attempts to rationalize through things as best as she can, even though she hates nearly everything. But the best part about Bianca? She makes mistakes. A lot of them. I loved the realism to her character, because girls do sometimes forget about their friends when they have a new love interest or other things going on. They have boy problems and hate the world and have self-esteem issues, and when you’re a teenager, it’s a very confusing time. I loved how well these issues translated into Bianca’s character. The only thing I didn’t like that involved Bianca was that we really never got to form our own opinions of her. Kody gave us adjectives to describe Bianca (like cynical, blunt, stubborn, smart, etc.) and usually when I’m explicitly given adjectives for a character, I never get a feel for who that character is. Small dislike, but dislike nonetheless.

Wesley, the main love interest (sort of? lol), was equally as intriguing as Bianca, and I’m a bit sad we didn’t get to see more of him. I enjoyed reading about him every single time, because the one thing he was is unpredictable. He had so many dimensions to him—it was almost like we were looking at a person with a very blatant public face and private face. On the outside, he’s confident, arrogant, man-whorish, and a jerk. On the inside, he’s gentle, caring, a great listener, lonely, and just wants to be accepted for who he is.

I really, really wish we had gotten more romance from Wesley and Bianca. I mean, what we got was great, but I wanted more! Their “fling” starts off with a bang and gets rolling right away, but their gradual interest with each other was what I loved the best. Bianca initially hates Wesley, but he grows on her after a time, and it was a refreshing change of pace in comparison to other novels. At the end, I couldn’t help but be giddy with everything Wesley was throwing at Bianca. That “Wesley Rush does not chase after girls, but...” line at the end had me going nuts! (I got giddy again right now just thinking about it!)

Mostly, I think this book was great for the message it delivered. Names like DUFF (which stands for Designated Ugly Fat Friend), or slut, or bitch, etc, are hurtful, even when they aren’t meant in a mean way. Even the strongest of girls will be put down, no matter how much they deny it doesn’t hurt them. And also, everyone will feel like a DUFF at one point in their lives. I know I have, and I still do. Beauty is subjective, and while you think your best friend is the most gorgeous person on the planet, she might think she looks hideous. But perhaps being the Duff is also a good thing, because it means you have friends to be compared to; you’re not alone, and that’s what matters.

Cover Musings: The cover is what grabbed me, really. I mean, huge DUFF splayed across the entire cover and partially covering the girls face. How could I not be intrigued? Then I got close enough to see what DUFF meant (Designated Ugly Fat Friend), and was sold. I had never heard of this term before, so props to the design team for piquing my interest.

Memorable Quotes:

“You, darling, are the Duff.”

“Is that even a word?”

“Designated. Ugly. Fat. Friend,” he claried. “No offense, but that would be you. It’s not like you’re an ogre or anything, but in comparison...” He shrugged his broad shoulders. “You have hot friends... really hot friends.” He paused, watching the action on the dance floor for a moment, before facing me again. “The point is, scientists have proven that every group of friends has a weak link, a Duff. And girls respond well to guys who associate with their Duffs.” (pg. 6)

 “I know you hate him,” she continued. “I wanted to make sure you were fine... and that he was okay, too. You didn’t, like, stab the boy, did you? I mean, I totally disapprove of murdering hotties, but if you need help burying the body, you know I’ll bring the shovel.” (pg. 72-73)

 When we reached the door of the unused janitor’s closet, I had no feeling of shame... not yet, at least.

I grasped the doorknob and noticed Wesley’s eyes narrow with suspicion. I yanked open the door, checked that no one was watching, and gestured for him to go inside. Wesley walked into the tiny closet, and I followed, shutting the door stealthily behind us.

“Something tells me this isn’t about The Scarlet Letter,” he said, and even in the dark I knew he was grinning. (pg. 83)

 “But I was wrong,” she said. “I thought I could escape from my problems, but I was so wrong, Bianca. No matter where you go or what you do to distract yourself, reality catches up with you eventually.” (pg. 125-126)

 The lump wasn’t going away. It just kept growing. All of my worries and fears had been leading up to this moment, and I couldn’t fight them back anymore. I couldn’t keep them bottled up. Tears started gushing down my cheeks, and before I knew it I was sobbing.

How had this happened? It felt like a bad dream.

I felt like my world was finally spinning out of control. And this time, I couldn’t deny it. I couldn’t ignore it. And I definitely couldn’t escape it. (pg. 173)

 That was something we all had in common. We were all sluts or bitches or prudes or Duffs.

I was the Duff. And that was a good thing. Because anyone who didn’t feel like the Duff must not have friends. Every girl feels unattractive sometimes. Why had it taken me so long to figure that out? Why had I been stressing over that dumb word for so long when it was so simple? I should be proud to be the Duff. Proud to have great friends who, in their minds, were my Duffs. (pg. 257)

Overall Thoughts/Final Comments: This was the perfect book to break me out of my sad funk lately. It had a very light-hearted premise. While it dealt with a few deep issues, it didn’t delve too far or get me too depressed reading about it. The Duff had some very strong messages about self-esteem, and I would recommend it to any teenager (that doesn’t mind excessive swearing). The romance was cute, and Wesley was so amazing from every angle. Not only does this book have great messages to deliver, but it screams realism at you – I loved Bianca, her outlet with Wesley, her gradual romance with him, her two best friends. This book was just plain honest and it was done well.

Rating: 5/5


**I submitted this review to the 2010 Debut Author Challenge!

Review: Do Tampons Take Your Virginity? by Marie Simas

Do Tampons Take Your Virginity?

Author: Marie Simas

Publisher: Deviant Troll Press

Series: N/A

Pages: 161

Genre: Non-fiction, chick-lit

Release Date: September 25, 2010

How Received: Author

Summary: Do Tampons Take Your Virginity? is a powerful, gut-wrenching memoir about what happens when you grow up in an insane Catholic family. Often surprisingly funny, the author's candid writing exposes the endurance it takes to survive a stifling, oppressive upbringing. It's an emotional roller coaster from start to finish, fiercely honest and sincere. Each memory is written in sharp episodic chapters to mimic the author's real experiences, which range from brutal to hilarious, and everything in between. This memoir shouldn't be missed! 

My Thoughts:

From the very first page, Marie exudes brazen, blatant honesty. Do Tampons Take Your Virginity? starts off with an ass/face towel anecdote – I kid you not – and it only delves deeper from there. I applaud Marie for being audacious enough to publicly write about these stories. I’d personally be too afraid of who from my past would read the stories. Marie, however, exposes every raw moment of her childhood – from abuse, to rape, to sexual encounters. This memoir was so full of honesty that I was mildly surprised at first; it takes some getting used to (my jaw dropped at least 10 times while I was reading).

This memoir was a complete emotional roller coaster. There were times when I cried, there were times when I laughed. I personally guarantee you will laugh at the first page of this memoir. But despite the wit and humor present in Marie’s memoir, there was also her father present – an ever looming figure of fear. Every time a scene with her father came up, I wanted to personally run over to Marie and give her a big hug. However, she doesn’t let us linger in the sadness for long. She seamlessly provides sporadic comic relief throughout the entire novel so that the oppression her father brings isn’t too overwhelming.

Not only is she bold enough to “come out” with her story, but she’s strong enough to withstand her father’s oppressions and the hurts she’s suffered. She could have easily succumbed and taken her abuse silently, or even become depressed, but that never happened. Her head was still held high and she took her life into her own hands once she hit college. I was very impressed with the strength that she had.

And I have to mention her grandmother Amalia, who I fell in love with. Any old grandma that chases a perverted old uncle up the street, screaming obscenities in Portuguese, is definitely okay in my book. She was always a constant beacon of hope, at least from my perspective. Every time her grandma was mentioned, everything would get slightly better – not completely, but marginally.

Lastly, I love the fact that Marie tried to go back and reconcile with a few people from her past that she had wronged, such as Randall Johnson. I gained so much respect for her for writing an apology to him, and even more-so for Randall, for graciously forgiving her.

Cover Musings: I was shocked when I first saw it, haha! I did a double-take, and was like, “Is that REALLY a tampon on the cover?” I just suppose it shows you how blunt this memoir is!

Memorable Quotes:

No one can hold a grudge like an old Catholic grandmother. (pg. 22)

Catholics have a love-hate relationship with sex. In most European and Latin American countries, it goes like this: the women are discouraged from having sex until marriage. The men, however, are encouraged to get laid as much as possible. This creates a real conundrum because, if all the women are waiting for marriage, how are the men going to get laid? (pg. 60)

When my period finally arrived, I was fourteen. To my mother’s horror, I bought tampons and never bothered using pads. Mother was convinced that I would lose my virginity to the tampons and that no man would want me if I was going to stick things in there. (pg. 70)

Rules of a Catholic Grandma
3. If your waitress puts little jams and jellies in foil packets on your table, it is perfectly all right to stuff them all in your purse and take them home. The same is true for ketchup and mayonnaise packets and any “free” bread that is put on the table. If you are lucky enough to be eating at a buffet, bring along the biggest purse you own. (pg. 92)

When I left that office, I thought I was hot shit. Less than five minutes later, I was a spectacle. Fired, sitting in the street with bloody knees and a broken ten-speed. God was good at teaching me some humility. (pg. 126)

Somehow, all of my husband’s cousins are named Juan.
Juan Carlos, Juan Antonio, Juan Horacio... and Oscar got a little pissy with me when I couldn’t tell them apart.

Catholics need a middle ground. People need to believe in a place like Purgatory. It gives assholes some hope. (Pg. 151)

All those years of happy memories had been forgotten. I had chosen to remember only the hate and anger. The proof was there; there were happy times, too. Years filled with laughter and joy. Was there a point where our lives made a dark turn, or had I ignored the positive aspects of my life for so many years that I no longer believed they had existed? I created a reality where there was nothing but darkness. (pg. 159)

Overall Thoughts/Final Comments: Do Tampons Take Your Virginity? is one hell of an emotional roller-coaster. One moment you could be crying, and the next, you’ll be laughing your head off. This novel is honestly intense, and intensely honest. It takes readers through the past to where Marie is today, and the conclusions that she’s drawn from her experiences in life. This novel is definitely thought-provoking, strong, and crazy. It deals with abuse, rape, forgiveness, mistakes, religion, stereotypes, and personal growth. I don’t normally read memoirs, but I’m glad I chose to read this one – I definitely recommend it to anyone out there (especially Catholics, such as myself).

Rating: 5/5

* I received this novel for review from the author (thank you Marie!) in exchange for an honest review.